Mortal
by StormOfTheNorth
Summary: Second chances have high prices. Yuri Lowell learned the hard way.


**AN: I should be updating my other stories but I just couldn't let the idea for this one slip away! :) However I have made considerable progress with my other stories and let it be known I will definitely update them sometime soon.**

**So! Prepare for a tale of much drama, pools of angst and emotion, bonds of friendship, thrilling suspense, splashes of action, romance... Or maybe not romance. We'll see. I do know where the adventure is going, though. I won't say much else otherwise I'll spoil it, but I am planning on this being a tad more character-driven than plot-driven. Aaaaaaand rating may go up for violence, etc. I'm not sure. Won't have anything too grotesque though.**

**I'll say this, though, if you're looking for a cute little happy bunny story, this isn't the right place.**

**On with the story! Hope you enjoy :)**

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own Tales of Vesperia.**

* * *

><p><em>-Mortal-<em>

**YURI WAS FALLING**. It was almost pitch black around him so his visibility was minimal, but he knew he was falling because he could feel it – that familiar roaring in his ears, wind clawing at his face and every inch of his exposed skin, just like when he fell off Zaude. It was cold too. It felt almost like he was speeding towards the bottom of the ocean, because when he looked up, he could see the faintest fragments of light twinkling above him far into the distance.

_But this can't be the ocean_, Yuri thought. He winced as he started to accelerate. He felt his skin start to tear, as the air howled even louder. Water didn't cut like this, he was certain. Instinctively, he tried to reach out for something to hold on to, but his arms were pinned to his sides from the pressure. He struggled, trying to move any, then all of his limbs without any success. The light grew farther and farther away until it disappeared entirely, and Yuri was all but blind.

_What a way to go_, Yuri thought, as more and more of his skin was sliced open. He willed himself to stay calm, thoroughly searching his brain for any idea of how to get out of this mess. The howling increased in pitch, warping into a loud, ear-splitting sound that sounded too much like a woman screaming from a torture Yuri didn't want to imagine. It was difficult enough to think straight, let alone come up with a plan. Yuri wondered if his ears would start bleeding. He wouldn't have been surprised.

Forcing the sound out of his mind the best he can, he assessed his current situation. He was falling into an abyss of some sort. His sight was rendered ineffective not too long ago, and his mobility with it. He was probably alone. He was unarmed.

He didn't like his prospects.

Out of options, Yuri tried to open his mouth. His chapped lips stung painfully, but eventually he succeeded. Using all his might, he sucked in his breath, and he shouted as loudly as he possibly could, hoping he would be heard by someone; anyone nearby. To his dismay, he couldn't even hear his own voice above the shrieking gale. Yuri's spirits were crushed, but he didn't curse or cry. A small smile tugged as his lips. He couldn't really deny it anymore.

He was dying.

_Maybe I'll get to see the Don…_ Yuri thought vaguely, as his body slowly grew numb from the dropping temperature. The sting of the wind against his raw skin was thankfully lessening too.

Just as he was about to let go completely, Yuri heard a voice.

"…uri… Yu… ri…!"

_Huh?_

"…Yu… ri!"

Yuri's head started to throb. The voice sounded like someone he knew. Pain pierced through his skull, sharp enough to make him cry out if he could.

_Why does that voice sound so familiar?_

"Yuri! Don't… give up…!"

Yuri wanted to answer. Answer, then question the voice that was so close, yet not close at all.

"Fight… back…!"

'How do I fight back?' Yuri wanted to ask. There so many questions racing in his brain, waiting to be fired. _Who are you? Why can't I see you? Where am I? How do you know me? Why am I here? Why…_

_Why does it hurt so much?_

"Yuri!"

The voice faded into nothingness, and Yuri was alone once again, but that last cry was all he needed. His head cleared, and finally he understood. Something heavy was squeezing at his heart, and he almost choked on the lack of air he suddenly found himself with, but he knew what he had to do.

Yuri pushed against the force dragging him downwards, his body felt like it was being stretched impossibly – he struggled and writhed and kicked, and pulled hard against the invisible chains, even though the more he tried the more painful it was, but it was nothing - _nothing_, compared to the pressure in his chest.

A soft light engulfed his body and the wind around him calmed. Yuri took a few deep breaths, shaking slightly from shock, but feeling warmth flooding his body. He glanced at his forearms. There wasn't a scratch on them. A faint tinkling sound like relieved laughter sounded behind him, but before Yuri could turn around to look, he was already soaring, high up towards the surface, back to where the first light was.

.

.

Yuri woke, back snapping instantly into a sitting position, eyes wide, and body drenched in sweat. He gulped down a lungful of air, then took several more before looking around wildly. Pain lanced up his neck as he turned it, a headache trailing slowly but surely behind it.

_What… happened?_ Yuri thought. His body ached all over, some places more than others. Experimentally he lifted his right hand. He lowered it just as quickly, however, feeling the muscles in his arm protest none too kindly. At least he was on a bed.

The small room he was in didn't look familiar at all. There were numerous machines and devices scattered around , as if the person whose room this was didn't like to clean, or had recently rummaged and ran through the devices frantically. The entire room was coloured varying shades of grey, the only exception being a window to his left, which let the pale moonlight float in around the bizarre devices obstructing its path. A machine hummed into life beside him, and a tiny yellow light flicked on, eventually changing to green.

"Huh… Yuri…?"

Yuri quickly turned his attention towards the source of the voice, surprised that he didn't even realise he wasn't alone when he woke up. A head of spiky brown hair lifted from its previous position on the bed to blink blearily at the man who had also woken up not too long ago. The boy blinked a few more times, eyes large as he sat up to take a good look at his companion.

"Oh my gosh… Yuri!" Karol's voice cracked a little, as the man before him offered a slight smile.

"Boss," Yuri answered simply. Karol rubbed at his eyes, not even trying to stifle the sobs starting to rack his body. Yuri briefly caught sight of the dark rings around the boy's eyes. How long had he been there? Was Karol watching over him this whole time? Yuri chuckled a little, trying to ease the boy's anxiety. He forced himself to reach over and ruffle his hair.

"Hey now, you're not a kid anymore," Yuri said softly. He still wasn't quite sure what had happened to warrant a mini sob-fest, but it looked like Karol wasn't in any condition to answer his questions any way.

"I… know…" Karol mumbled between hiccups. The boy had grown a lot in the past three or so years. His height even matched Estelle's now.

Yuri's dream came back to him in a rush, and his head pounded even more. Yuri retracted his hand, laying it to rest beside him. Another wave of pain rolled through him, and his face contorted in agony for a brief moment. It passed quickly, but not quickly enough to avoid Karol's watchful gaze.

"Y-Yuri!" Karol cried in concern. "You need to take it easy!"

"Estelle." Yuri grunted, body shaking slightly. He lifted his head to look at Karol directly. Maybe it was a strange question to ask, but Yuri had to know.

"Where's Estelle?"

Karol averted his eyes. Yuri felt his heart stop.

That was all he needed to see.

"Hey, boss…" Yuri said lightly. "I'm a little tired, but I think I'll be okay on my own now…"

Hesitation crossed Karol's face before he stood. He looked at Yuri sadly.

"A-Alright then, Yuri," Karol murmured. He wiped the last of his tears with his sleeve. Yuri offered another smile.

"Why so gloomy? I really am okay, you know."

Karol thumped a fist hard onto the side of the bed. Yuri quietened. He watched as the young teen stared hard at a spot on the bed, body trembling. When Karol squeezed his eyes shut, Yuri didn't expect the next few quiet words to come out of the teen's mouth.

"You're a strong guy, Yuri. You've always been like that, and I've always looked up to you for it. But…"

When Karol opened his eyes again, they were glistening fiercely, but he looked at Yuri with a force of resolve that rendered the swordsman speechless.

"…I hope that one day you'll be able to cry in front of me too."

Yuri wanted to laugh, wanted to ask Karol what he was talking about, but the words caught treacherously in his throat. Nothing else was said, and Karol quietly exited the room. Yuri was alone again, trapped by the filtered air and humming machinery. He raised a shaky hand up to his cheek, swiping at it jerkily, before pulling it back to look at it. The moonlight reflected off the unmistakeable moisture on his fingertips. Breathing hard and shallow, he continued to rub almost frantically at his face, at the tears he could see but barely feel.

"Stop," he whispered softly. "Stop."

They didn't stop. Not until his eyes were red and raw, and the first rays of dawn crept into the room, did he surrender himself to unconsciousness once more.

.

.

"He doesn't really eat much," Karol reported nervously. "I think he has nightmares."

"Just make sure he eats what you give him."

"But shouldn't you just see him?" Karol blurted. Rita looked up from the thick book she had immersed herself in. A glare wrote itself onto her features, something dark and heavy. Karol held his ground.

"I've told you a thousand times. I don't want to see him."

"Estelle would've wanted-"

The book in Rita's hands made contact with Karol's face with a loud crack. The youth turned his head to the side just in time to change his fate from broken nose to bruised cheek and sliced lip.

"Get out."

Karol silently acquiesced. He was smart enough to know that when Rita shouted, she was mad, but when her voice quietened down like that, she was prepared to kill. She probably wouldn't kill _him_, and she didn't get like this very often, but when she did, he was certain the door to the world of hurt was very close by.

But Karol also trusted that Rita knew the right thing to do, even when she was temperamental and emotionally unstable, otherwise, why else would she stay in the clinic? Out of their whole group, she may well be the least likely to abandon a friend. Karol knew, maybe because she was the closest to him in age, and he had watched her grow during their dysfunctional friendship. Maybe she had come the farthest of them all.

Karol passed by Judith in the corridor. He stopped in his tracks once the gap between them widened to several paces. She did the same.

"I wouldn't bother her right now," he said thickly. Judith was quiet for a moment. Karol waited for the click of her heels to continue, but her voice came before that, soft and gentle. It was a tone seldom heard from Judith, but then again it seemed everyone was changing rapidly from the shock everything that happened. Some events you move on from.

Others leave you under a fifty tonnes of debris in a world suddenly gone rotten.

"It's not easy, having to be the strong one."

The words flowed easily from her mouth, but the weight behind them was as strong as it could ever be. Karol's hands curled into fists at his sides. He started trembling uncontrollably, wanted to start crying again, but then he would prove Judith's words wrong and show her how little he had progressed this whole time, and that he was the same weak, terrified, little boy now that he was back when they first met.

"Yeah," Karol said, forcing stability into his voice. "It isn't."

And it was so _ironic_ that he agreed with her, when he only agreed because he wasn't strong enough to tell her that he wanted so badly to break.

"It's strange," Judith began. "Your words are true, but your voice is not."

Karol winced openly, screwing his eyes shut. "…I know."

Judith laughed, tinkling, and easy, and light, and melancholic all at once. "Have more faith in yourself, boss. You've done well."

Finally Judith's footsteps started again. Karol's did not. Only when the door clicked shut after Judith entered Rita's temporary office did Karol start running. He pushed his way through doors, past people, all the way out the clinic, and he didn't stop running until he reached the small jetty by the river and he sank to his knees and he broke.

.

.

Why were they all here anyway? What was there to do? Raven had never felt this restless since he was a youth; a tiny sparrow in the knights, before he was Raven, and before he was Schwann. Age had taught him patience, and wisdom, but the hell good did it do for him now? His eyes travelled to the peaceful face beneath the glass, and he could almost pretend that she was sleeping.

He wanted then to break something. To kick and shout curse words at fate, at any deity that might be listening. Why did he let himself think such useless thoughts? Why couldn't the kid have just saved her?

He knew though. The one he was mad at most was himself, because he now, he can never repay her. When he had cut her with betrayal, she offered him grace. For every time he healed her, she would return the favour ten times over. He churned out jests and cheap lines, but she held out second chances.

The blastia on his chest felt heavy. He pulled at it, gently at first, but gradually he tugged harder and harder until he could almost feel his flesh ripping. The door to his right swung open with a barely audible creak. Raven didn't look up. He didn't need to see the hurt written on his visitor's face at his petty weakness. He accepted his fate.

The young mage pummelled and punched and kicked him until he was bruised all over, but he was still alive. Once it was over, Raven opened the eye she hadn't blackened, an unspoken apology lingering in his cool blue gaze. Rita straightened, eyes stinging, lungs burning, but she looked directly at the man kneeling on the ground.

"I can't do this. I know that. I know it _so damn well_," she whispered. Raven was silent.

"But that doesn't mean I'm not trying. And that means you can't give up either, stupid old man."

Finding it difficult to form words, Raven just nodded at her. Rita's eyes trailed over to the glass case holding the body of her best friend, before darting away quickly, as though her eyes were being burned by merely looking. She walked over to the door, resting her fingers on the handle.

"I…I'm going to see Yuri," Rita said finally. Her voice was small, but Raven heard every word as clearly as if she had shouted. He coughed, hoarse and painful.

"'Bout time," he managed to croak. Rita half-turned towards him.

"I'll check up on you too, afterwards."

"Why?"

Rita looked at him carefully. When she spoke again, her voice was quiet. Resigned. Exhausted. "Because I'll regret it if I don't."

Raven shook his head. "I meant… why do ya come here… if it hurts so much?"

Rita swung the door wide open. Her back was turned to him now and her face was hidden, but her silent answer spoke volumes louder than any voiced one.

"Do anything stupid and I'll make sure you regret it."

The door clicked shut. Loneliness returned to him, embracing him from behind like an old friend. Slowly, Raven picked himself up off the tiled floor, struggling to shrug off the weight on his shoulders, and his prosthetic heart. He had slipped again. He had to be picked up again.

Raven knew he was a weak man. But he also knew that kids shouldn't have to bear burdens thrice their size, and when it came to adulthood, there was never a further, more laughable number than 18.

So for the younger generation, Raven would stand. And he would fight for them until his last breath.

.

.

"You did this to me," Yuri said, gesturing at the device on his chest. There was no tone of accusation in his voice, but Rita felt it all the same and she hated it. She wasn't supposed to feel guilty. She wasn't supposed to feel this much at all.

Was that really the first thing he had to say to her after all this time? Not that it mattered to her. She swallowed that pretty lie without blinking.

"Yeah," Rita said, nodding curtly. "I did."

Yuri sighed, leaning back against the extra pillows Karol had brought him out of paranoia and anxiety.

"So I'm like Raven now?"

"Yeah, you are." Rita hesitated. "…But not quite."

Yuri raised an eyebrow. "Which is it?"

Rita paused again, then shook her head. "What does it matter to you?"

"Well, seeing as it's stuck onto my body."

"It's a… complicated device."

"Hm, figures." Yuri shifted a little, to get a better look at the girl sitting on the stool next to his bed. His gaze grew serious. "So… are you finally gonna fill me in on what happened?"

"Huh? What did the others talk to you about in here then?" Rita asked almost angrily. "The weather?"

Yuri smiled wanly. "Relax. Everyone just thought it would be better if… you told me."

"Oh."

"Rita?" Yuri asked when she zoned out, a troubled expression on her features. She jolted in her seat. "Y-Yeah?"

"I'm not mad at you or anything."

Rita laughed, a hollow, empty sound that Yuri didn't want to hear from anyone again. "You don't even remember."

"So tell me." Yuri leaned over, gripping his hand onto her shoulder tightly. Rita didn't move an inch. He looked at her hard, but she was finding it difficult to meet his eyes. "Rita, please…"

"You're the one that's supposed to tell me," Rita said eventually. Her eyes slowly found his, anguish pooling in her dark green irises. "We weren't even there."

"Weren't _where_?" Yuri said tensely, starting to get frustrated. Rita took hold of the wrist by her shoulder, squeezing it hard.

"That basement… where we found you…" Rita whispered, knuckles white. "…Remember?"

"Augh…" Yuri grunted. He tried to pull his hand away from her shoulder, but Rita only tightened her grip further. With his free hand, he clutched at his eye, pain exploding in his head.

"That man...!" Yuri gasped, feeling like his skull was splitting. "He did… to us… agh!"

"Yuri…" Rita said shakily. "What did he…?"

The pain gradually subsided to a dull thumping in his head and Yuri calmed down. The hand on his eye lowered. Their gazes locked again.

"I know what happened," Yuri said lowly, his voice steady. "I know that, but… Estelle should be…"

Shock crossed fleetingly across Rita's face. She was silent as Yuri racked his brain, searching for an answer that wasn't there.

"What do you know?" Rita breathed.

"She isn't around anymore," Yuri said quietly, watching closely for Rita's reaction. "…Is she?"

Rita's hand on his wrist dropped to her side. She closed her eyes, her face betraying nothing. "You don't get it."

"What..."

"I'm the one that killed Estelle."


End file.
